The driver, who claimed to have had sex for the first time at 13, explained his life choices and how they have affected his marriage.
Read the full story below:
“The Indriver that carried me today is 41 years old. He told me he started having sex at 13. I call it rape cuz that’s what I believe that older woman did to him. His wife left him 2 years ago after 6 years of marriage. She was pregnant with their third child, and she left with all the kids. He told me she left because he cheated. He started cheating after just 3 months of marriage. He confessed to her and she told him to do some STDs test and not touch her for the next 3 months. That made matters worse to him. He said he has a high libido but his wife didn’t like sex. He married her as a virgin and their first sex happened about a month after their wedding. He was a nymphomaniac (not sure the English word for the male version of this) before getting married but he thought he’d be faithful to his wife.
He realized he was stupid to think that a little too late, he acknowledged this to me. Yesterday alone, he had sex with 4 ladies. He had sex this morning too and showed me texts from two women begging him to come and sleep with them again. He has exes in relationships coming to get serviced by him. His HMO covers his sexual health needs and he always uses a condom. I told him this was a problem and he needs to block these women. He kept laughing. He sounded and seemed stuck. He had sex with his ex-wife last in May (she called him to come coded-ly) and he was so sure she hasn’t had sex again since then. He also said she was whack in bed. He believes sex should be had everyday.
When I told him he’s “living the life”, he said that’s what everyone says. His wife wanted to be a reverend sister. But she told him that reverend fathers came at night to ask them for sex and she couldn’t deal so she left. She has 3 sisters and they all got married before her, including the last born. She’d had bad luck with men so when she met her ex-husband (our Indriver today), she just rushed into marriage. He said they only dated for like 6 months and she “pressured” them into marriage. They didn’t get to know each other much before tying the knot. He believes that was part of their major problems. He says he also lost his job and had financial issues at the time she left him so those contributed as well. He insists she’s stubborn, unromantic and never believes she’s wrong. He still pays his children’s school fees although it comes late sometimes.
He does a number of contributions to meet up though, cuz he’s an Indriver and the school fees of his three kids add up to about 150k. He enjoyed the conversation with me and took my number to keep in touch while he continued with his work and I dropped at my co-working space too. This was a shocking, intriguing, kinda scary chat – different from any I’ve ever had. But guys, this is beyond me. From a Christian POV, I’m dumbfounded and confused on how to advise him. And even just as a human being, I really think he needs help. This is crazy and I told him. He kept laughing. It’s a matter of time before he meets and sleeps with karishika. Meanwhile, some STDs don’t know the face of condom o.
Moral lessons, please:
– stop raping children, or anyone at all
– don’t marry a person you don’t know, date please – don’t marry out of peer pressure
– be sexually attracted to your future partner before marriage (I did not say test run o, mbok)
– churches, add proper sex ed to your marriage counselling sessions
– don’t allow anyone pressure you into early sex, especially as a minor
– read up on vaginismus, many women experience painful sex and I believe it’s due to societal/ religious conditioning that associates shame/pain with female bodies and sex.”
