One of the most common challenges in many marriages today is the shared notion that marriage is about perseverance, which is often misinterpreted, leaving many couples struggling alone rather than seeking help during the period of change. The transition period, which is another word for change, is a testing time for most marriages and a couple’s capacity to control this season can become a testament to their love and commitment to each other.
However, change can be comprehended in different ways and if you and your spouse have not really prepared for this period in your marriage, it can bring tremendous fear, misery, and threats to your marriage. It is important to prepare for the transition by putting different strategies in place to help you manage it as effectively as possible.
Set reasonable goals
Transition can be challenging if you have not set yourselves reasonable goals you are more likely to achieve within a certain period in your marriage. Even if you are still on the journey to achieve most of them, setting realistic goals ahead can help you manage the changes. This can be as simple as praying together regularly if you are of a similar faith; taking time out occasionally as a couple, away from everyone, to reflect on your marriage can become an enormous benefit during the transition. When you have the necessary values in place and you are consistent at honouring them, you are both likely to enjoy a smooth transition when it comes because you have prepared ahead and prioritised your wellbeing above everything else.
Develop a positive mindset
Most transitions have been known to bring positive outcomes when couples can recognise the purpose behind the period of change. Just like life itself, marriage is not stagnant; it is intended to grow and flourish so that you can both bring the best versions of yourselves to your marriage. Developing a positive mindset will allow you to discover the different opportunities the changes can bring to your marriage rather than focus on the challenges; you will be encouraged to focus on the bigger picture.
Share your feelings
It can be seen as normal, especially in this society, to keep things to yourselves when changes occur in your marriage, as the fear of sharing the news with families and friends can be daunting at first. It is important to share your feelings with each other and be honest enough to express how you feel about sharing the change with others outside your marriage. Your opinions may be different, and you may need to come to an agreement to know what is best, especially if sharing information will bring the support you are likely to need at this time.
Practise empathy
Even though you and your spouse are on this journey together, you must also bear it in mind that you are from different backgrounds and have had different experiences in life. While you may think that the change has come at a good time for both of you to make the necessary adjustments to adapt to the change, your spouse may not be emotionally ready for the responsibility and this is when you should be considerate and empathetic towards your spouse so that he/she does not feel like they are dealing with their feelings alone.
