These parties of course come with a lot of dancing, merry making amongst friends and comedians entertaining guests with rib cracking jokes, while the Master of ceremony acknowledges dignitaries intermittently. The musician of course eulogises the celebrant and important friends, who in turn show appreciation by ‘spraying’ money as a reward on the celebrant and musician as desired.
It is not uncommon to eat a five course meal in no particular order during the course of one Owambe party. It would include appetizers like corn and coconut, small chops of different grades, the main meal in different varieties such as jollof rice or amala and ewedu, pounded yam with vegetable soup, desserts and other delicacies which may include, Suya (barbecued meat), Boli (roasted plantain) and roasted groundnuts or, the latest craze of garri (cassava flakes), milk, sugar and fish. You could also ask for Ewa (beans) Agoyin (agoni) and Dodo (fried plantain) with fried pepper stew as extras.
There are many things associated with an Owambe party. These days, the women employ the services of professionals to put their makeup in place and tie their geles (headtie) where applicable. Sometimes family and friends turn up in matching asoebi or anko (the party uniform) for the occasion. Now, there is even a red carpet reception with a photo station booth for guests. Small mobile bands entertain the guests upon arrival and departure outside the party venue. There is fun and funfair at every angle you look. There are waiters serving food and drinks, while ushers are making sure everyone is comfortable. The Drivers and personal aides are not left out of the feeding arrangements, as special packs are provided for them. This Owambe production is so sophisticated now that most people engage the services of an event planner to achieve a seamless experience. The other amazing bit of our Owambe is the distribution of souvenirs to guests. Souvenirs range from the very basic plastic bowls to garri and kuli-kuli, to the very exotic mobile phones or even automobiles depending on the grade of the party or the category of the guests.
My recent experience back home meant that I attended four of such events within one week. It started with the forty days final burial rite for my friend’s Dad on Saturday. It was quickly followed by my Mum’s 90th birthday party. We had a small party of about 600 guests on a weekday! By the following Saturday, it was a friend’s 60th birthday with yet another friend’s 60th birthday on Sunday. I just narrowly missed the Owambe party of another 90th birthday of a friend’s Mother on Monday, because I was returning to post that night.
As I reflected on my week, I came to the realisation that Owambe is truly and authentically therapeutic. The process of preparing for each one kept me busy. One had to coordinate the outfits to match the colours prescribed and ensure that appropriate gifts were sorted out for each event. There was no time to be bored. There was no dull moment. As we made our way to each party, the fellowship with friends began with pictures being taken and pleasantries exchanged. We caught up with outstanding gist despite the blaring music. I would never understand why the music has to be that loud. Gossip in the situation was difficult except you are a die hard for such. It is really interesting that most of the speakers mounted on stage are not even functional. The number of speakers is supposed to indicate how wealthy the musician is. Then of course, the musician called us out to dance in groups. I particularly enjoyed the different styles that people danced to the latest popular tunes. Buga by Kizz Daniel is a personal favourite. The small chops were delightful. The only bit I don’t like is the wastage we sometimes see, of people collecting more than they can eat or drink.
I have concluded that this culture of Owambe is actually good for our mental health. There is camaraderie and real joy of being in the midst of true friends. A lot of the happy hormone is released and you can put your issues aside. The fellowship with friends is absolutely invaluable. It dims your sorrows at least for those hours.
If it is any consolation to anyone who is not too keen on Owambe, I found the time to deliver the keynote speech at the Members Day of LCCI – Lagos Chamber of Commerce and Industry on Friday, July 28, 2023. I spoke on, ‘The Impact of International Trade on the Economic Growth of Nigeria’.
As I landed at my post again, it dawned on me that there is no place like home, truly. We find a way to laugh in-spite of our challenges in Nigeria. The communal arrangements and real cooperation we enjoy even at such parties cannot be overemphasised. People gave of their time, cash, materials and in kind towards my Mum’s birthday. I guess, this is my way of saying thank you for helping us to achieve the true Owambe therapy for our family, neighbours and friends. I don’t take this culture for granted. We thrive, we relax and enjoy being together. This is no wonder, we are called one of the happiest people on earth.
When next you get an opportunity to attend an Owambe party, maximise the moment, it is not everyone that is so privileged. The Owambe therapy is real!
* Ambassador Eniola Ajayi writes from The Hague, Netherlands.
